Phul Chunan
i.m. Anisha Dang, 1972-2003
At the cremation grounds, your father holds
my hand and says, On my veranda, late
at night, I’d hear the wind chimes that she hung
and think, ‘My daughter is so beautiful.’
Behind him, priests are washing off your bones
so loudly that I barely hear the rest —
I never climbed the stairs to tell her so.
When someone hands me marigolds, I take
my turn and drop them in the bright bronze urn.
The lid is closed. The ribbon seems too red.
At Gangotri, where they’ll finally let you go,
the marigolds will mark your progress, bright
like grace notes on the current, like the words
I wish I’d heard, or wish I could have spoken.
Note: Phul Chunan is
a ceremony that takes place on the fourth morning after cremation,
when the bones are picked from the cooled ashes of the funeral pyre.
Phul chunan means picking, or selecting
the flowers in Punjabi.